Never Let Fear Decide Your Fate

"Never Let Fear Decide Your Fate" This is a quote that is currently hanging on my bedroom wall. It is truly a saying that I am trying to live by, and it's hard. I have pretty bad anxiety and it has often stopped my from taking advantage of life.It's the crippling kind of anxiety where even the thought of just leaving my house is terrifying. I've had a lot of time to work through this anxiety but it's still a daily task to overcome. So often I find myself looking at this quote on my wall and trying my best to follow it, "Never Let Fear Decide Your Fate". Why this took me so long to learn I'm unsure of, but yet here I am learning and growing. That's the thing about fear, it stops you from progressing. It stops you from becoming better.

The definition of fear is, "an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat." Often times I find myself giving fear a voice and letting my hope and courage be overshadowed by fear. An example of this is when I told a good friend about how I felt about them. I was so scared of how I would react or how the other person would react that I just held it in. The truth is I was letting fear determine my fate. By not voicing my opinion or feelings I was letting fear win. To conquer fear you must give your courage and your identity a voice. So that's what I did. I was honest about my feelings and told the person. I felt so much better because I didn't let fear decide how I was going to feel or what I was going to do. Once you can do this, you loose shame and you can overcome your fear. That doesn't mean the situation will turn out how you want it to, it didn't for me but what was important was that I was left with no regrets, I was honest and I didn't let fear determine my fate.

So how do I do this? Because of my anxiety medicine and some good advice I'm able to stop the anxiety and fear cycle. I stop it at the thought and I stop it at the "what ifs". Something I always try and follow in life is to speak the truth and be honest about my feelings. Once I'm honest with myself and with others then I can let go of that fear, yes it takes vulnerability, but vulnerability is how we grow.

My endometriosis became and excuse for my fear to take over. "What if.. I am in pain?, What if.. I don't feel well? What if... I'm too tired?" all litigate things to be concerned about but not things to overcome my true desires and take over my life. So my simple advice for you is to not let that fear decide your fate. Let your true desires decide your fate. Let your goals and dreams decide your fate. Let go of the "What ifs..." and follow your dream, because you never know where it will take you. If you determine that by fear, you'll never get the chance to at least try.

Something that helped me understand fear and shame is a book by Brene Brown called, "Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead" It's currently $10.57. This book has helped transform the tiny things in my life to help me conquer the big things.

I've been through some very tough things even in the last few months and I often found myself relating back to this book to help me get through the hard times and be vulnerable at the same time with my loved ones, that is what helps me overcome my fear.